The Double-Edged Sword

doubledgedswordMy husband is a man with such integrity; this is one of the qualities that attracted me to him. When we met I loved the fact that he was always confident to do the right thing even when it went against the status quo. What a man!

Then came the time when we stayed at a five-star hotel in Nevada and I ran out to the store for a bottle of wine to enjoy in the room (trying to save a few bucks), when I walked into the hotel with it, Mark reminded me about the note in the room that said no outside alcohol was allowed. I thought to myself, what a ‘goody-two shoes”! Ok, now this integrity thing is going too far!

Does this happen to you? The qualities you love about someone are also the same qualities that drive you crazy! Maybe your significant other is friendly and outgoing, everyone loves her but then it ultimate drives makes you nuts because you think people take advantage of her. Or your husband was always so fun and was the life of the party but now that you have a family and other obligations, you wish he’d grow up! It could be the financially secure, responsible one you fell for who was a “rock” who now seems to be a bore and a “tight wad”.

Isn’t it interesting that every person’s personality traits have the “double-edged sword”. In most cases we don’t even realize this. Many relationships struggle because as time goes on, we start focusing on the negative side of a trait and have no idea that is what we initially fell in love with. If we are conscious of this and recognize it then we can choose a different reaction. Because, guess what, you too have the double-edged sword to your personality and are probably getting on your significant other’s nerves as well.

Think about this and take inventory of your last disagreements or conflicts and chances are that wonderful amazing quality is the root cause of the issue. Regardless of the person there will always be this struggle. Now that you know this, pick your battles.

What if we all were aware of this dichotomy going into relationships and accepted the double edged sword as a whole, we’d probably be much more accepting and save ourselves a lot of frustration. What do you think?

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